DEADPOOL 2's Domino Doesn't Really Look Like Domino

..uh, yeah. How does that look anything like this?


Now, I'll be honest, I actually wouldn't mind this costume if this was a different character. Redesigns are cool and all, to a point where there are some that end up being superior than the original design; but, there comes a time where its so drastic, that its almost unrecognizable from what a character was originally supposed to be. Ultimately, I'm not surprised at how this turned out. After all, the Marvel movies coming from Fox have not had a good track record for comic-accurate costumes outside of the first Deadpool and (shockingly enough) the Tim Story Fantastic Four movies.

Whatever, there's a decent chance Zazie Beetz will be good (if not great) here; but, for now, this and other reasons I'll get to in a separate post are putting me in a very skeptical position on Deadpool 2.

Home Video Catch Up: THE BELKO EXPERIMENT

On the surface, the setup for The Belko Experiment is little more than an excuse for some quick cheap thrills and you'd be pretty much right. That statement may seem pointless; yet, its really the first (and possibly only) step to realizing whether or not you're going to like this movie. Well, there's that and if you're able/willing to get over the fact that the premise isn't entirely original. That critic quote you've been seeing calling this flick "OFFICE SPACE meets BATTLE ROYALE" might as well be a back handed compliment.
Acting-wise, this isn't anything special. John Gallagher Jr. manages to do an admirable job of keeping his head above water (or would it be blood?) amongst all the insanity. Tony Goldwyn is remarkably despicable as what might be the worst boss in existence. Even Sean Gunn is a lot of fun as the smartest person in the entire building, which is especially funny when you see how his character introduced.
Underneath all the carnage, there is some clever satire about the corporate machine and the dark side of human nature. Granted, the subtextual nature of that previously mentioned satire doesn't elevate this stuff to the level of the original RoboCop*; but, its enough to make sure the chaos isn't entirely mindless.
Speaking of the violence, oh me oh my is this film creative with its splatter. Almost everything under the sun is used as a weapon: tables, tape dispensers, staplers, pens, you name it. Alongside all of that and some idiosyncratic covers of famous songs, there's a wicked sense of humor that keeps it from getting outright miserable or too abrasive.

Just imagine someone remaking Office Space with every character being about as mentally unhinged as D-FENS from Falling Down and buckets upon buckets of blood being splattered all over the place, all capped off with a seriously sick sense of humor. The Belko Experiment certainly isn't for everyone; but, I got a kick out of it. Plus, if you want a lean, mean bit of modern day exploitation cinema, you can do a lot worse than this.

THE BELKO EXPERIMENT gets a...
BLOODY GOOD TIME out of TEN

*Incidentally, its kind of great to know that old production companies like Orion Pictures are coming back. :)

A Speculative Non-Review of THE EMOJI MOVIE 🤢

"The Emoji Movie comes out later this summer; so, plan accordingly (lock your doors, set the alarms, and hug your family). Something that shouldn't exist finally does and we're all the lesser for it. The doomsday clock is ticking faster and faster while I sit here counting every spiteful second that goes by. Cheers!"

That was how I ended my critique of the trailer for The Emoji Movie (which you can go read by clicking here). Some may have taken issue with my admittedly hyperbolic response to that cringeworthy piece of marketing or maybe you all took it as the scathing bit of semi-satire that it was supposed to be. Now, I'll admit I was with everyone else and treated this flick like a punching bag; however, what I couldn't have predicted....

...was that it was going to be THIS bad. 

I mean, oh my....

In all my years as a film fan, I cannot say for the life of me that I've seen a film this mainstream get this harsh a reception. Then again, I probably should've predicted it was going to get this savaged by critics because of the basic idea behind this movie. The best we can all hope for is that this thing flops finanially as much as it has critically. And, for the curious among you all, here are the some of the most entertaining reviews that I've seen so far.* So, grab some popcorn, stay home and get comfortable. Because I get the feeling we're going roasting this disaster for a long, LONG time.

https://www.vox.com/summer-movies/2017/7/27/16037862/emoji-movie-review-garbage-fire-poo-patrick-stewart

http://nypost.com/2017/07/27/emoji-movie-sucks-sadface/

http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/movies/review-emoji-movie-big-steaming-pile-article-1.3361271

http://www.indiewire.com/2017/07/the-emoji-movie-review-bad-patrick-stewart-tj-miller-anna-faris-spotify-1201860781/

http://www.vulture.com/2017/07/the-emoji-movie-will-send-you-into-a-spiral-emoji-of-despair.html

*Before I go off to do something more meaningful with my life, I wanted to say that Matinee Everyday will not be reviewing this garbage. Why? Because that would mean I'd have to get up, go to my car, drive to the theater, look another grown adult in the eye saying "One adult for the Emoji Movie", shell out over ten well-earned dollar bills and sit down for 86 minutes to witness this catastrophic disgrace to the art of cinema. Frankly, I don't have the lack of inhibition or disrespect towards all of you to do that. I hope not giving this film money will teach Sony a lesson about hubris or something.

Farewell for now, mere mortals.

JUSTICE LEAGUE Won SDCC 2017

As many who know me can vouch for, Zack Snyder's Justice League is my most anticipated movie of the year. Yes, I'm even more excited for this than I am for The Last Jedi. I've been waiting to see the greatest team of superheroes in the history of comics up on screen since I was a little kid. And, oh boy, this trailer knocked it right out of the park. Thankfully, this lengthy trailer manages to keep a good chunk of the plot details under wraps while still giving a more than sufficient amount of awesome moments. From the fight sequences to the back-and-forth banter between the League's various members to the background details like the design of the Parademons and the red skies, everything about this feels like a dream come true for a DC fan like myself. Plus, that bit at the end with Alfred was a perfect way to tease Superman's return. I don't care how many other blogs are running numerous thinkpieces on who he's talking to. There is almost zero chance that isn't Supes.

Anyway, I think saying anything else would be pointless droning on. This movie looks dank and here's hoping I'm right.

READY PLAYER ONE is "The Holy Grail of Pop Culture"

First things first, let me just say that the smarmy dismissal of this film just from the trailer is both confusing and rather depressing. Not only because this is a film from living legend Steven Spielberg, but also because the actual trailer is pretty darned cool if you ask me. If this exact same trailer came out when I was eight years old, I would've prematurely declared it as the greatest thing put to celluloid. Aside from the whole Tron meets Borderlands aesthetic, there's a whole bunch of cool bits and pieces scattered throughout this teaser. This is worth it just to know that there is a movie with Freddy Kruger, The Iron Giant, The DeLorean, T.J. Miller and Simon Pegg. This looks and feels like something I would (probably will) absolutely adore. We'll find out if I'm right next March. Plus, a trailer that uses Rush's "Tom Sawyer" for futuristic action scenes is going to be awesome.

SIDE NOTE: This bit right here is a little overblown and probably the only cringeworthy thing about this trailer.

IT Gets A Fantastically Creepy Trailer

My initial thoughts on the first teaser for IT were a little mixed. Now that some time has passed, its grown on me and I'm legitimately confident that this is going to be a good film (probably better than the original made-for-television flick starring Tim Curry). With this new trailer, I'm still thinking that.

One of the things I've picked up on in the leadup to this flick is so how choosing to divide Stephen King's lengthy source material into two movies. Part of this could have been out of necessity and a desire for double the potential profits; yet, I think its because it work better as two movies. Plus, if this is good but doesn't do well enough to justify a sequel, there will still be a film that focuses on the more interesting/meaty aspect of the story.

Let's get to the nitty-gritty and talk about what's the iconic aspect of this story: Pennywise. From the skin-crawling voice to that ghoulish laugh, Bill Skarsgård seems to have brought a real physical presence to the role that I can't help but find extremely unsettling. Aside from the clown himself, there's plenty of great creepy imagery (especially with whats inside that spooky looking house). Plus, it looks like they did a solid job of casting the Loser's Club.

Overall, this is a great trailer that will hopefully lead to a great movie. Maybe, it'll float 🎈

Trailers! Trailers! Trailers! #5

Yeah, yeah. You know the drill...

A WRINKLE IN TIME

Okay, I'll be frank here: I have no familiarity with the book this film is based on. With that said, its a name I've heard thrown around in various conversations over the years and, from what I've gathered, it has a special place in the hearts of many people. Not much else to say except that I'm digging the trippy visuals promised by this teaser.

THE DISASTER ARTIST

Honestly, I'm shocked this movie is only coming out now instead of coming out a few years ago. Whatever, we've finally got a movie based around the comprehension-defying so-bad-its-good cult classic The Room. This teaser doesn't give away much plotwise; but, it looks like James Franco and his cronies are delivering a film that's both hilarious and sincere. Plus, the buzz for this coming out SXSW back in March is killer.

BLADE RUNNER 2049

I, like most cinephiles, was very skeptical when they announced production of a sequel to the ethereal sci-fi classic Blade Runner (seriously, if you've never seen it, go track down the Final Cut and watch it on the biggest screen in your possession); however, considering the talent involved and how stunning the last trailer was, I'd say there's a good chance of this being a pretty stellar film in its own right. Plus, this trailer is also gang-busters. There's certainly interesting things in this trailer that have A) been covered extensively elsewhere and B) constitute for spoilers for both films. Will it better than the original? Of course not; yet, I'm relatively confident that should be a treat once October rolls around.

THE SHAPE OF WATER

There are many filmmakers working today for which I can say each new work from them is a cause for celebration. Without a shadow of a doubt, Guillermo del Toro is one of those directors and it looks like he has another winner on his hands. The Cold War setting looks like its lended to some exquisite production design and the cast is pretty solid. Also, it's got Doug Jones treading familiar waters* playing a fish man. I'm all for it!

*pun intended.

Stay tuned for a couple more trailer reviews coming in the very near future.